“If you don’t make new memories, the old ones will kill you” – Kathy Lee Gifford
I am trying to be brave.
And it takes concerted effort.
It is far easier to curl up in a ball on the couch and binge a mindless show. Or eat a pint of ice cream. Or mourn the old memories:
All the remnants of my old life and old memories.
Making an effort to create new experiences and memories requires dedication and work. Essential oils have helped make the process easier.
In order to step out of your comfort zone, you need to first visualize what you want – because if you don’t know where you are going, every road will take you there.
Once you are clear on what you want – which if we are being honest can be really hard, especially for lifetime pleasers who have been so conditioned to support other people’s desires that we may have fallen out of touch with our own – you then need to figure out a plan to execute it.
This means getting off the couch and out the door.
That first step kept me paralyzed for a long time. I used to joke that when I don’t know what to do, I do nothing. But over time, it stopped feeling funny.
Now that my daughter is leaving for college and the nest is empty, I knew something had to shift.
So I started to make an effort.
I joined organizations that I thought might lead to new connections. When I met people that I liked, I reached out to them to meet for coffee or hikes. I opened myself up to the thing that scared me most – dating.
It was terrifying at first.
I would have to douse myself with Parasympathetic® just to get myself out of the house.
But then I started to relax – I don’t know if it was the Parasympathetic® oil or the company – and have fun. And even laugh a little or a lot.
And it started to feel easier.
And I started to feel braver, or at least slightly less fearful.
To that point, I think that bravery might be misunderstood. It’s not that you need to be brave to try new things. It’s that you need to have a system to allow you to take a small step in a new direction. You don’t need to run a marathon, you just need to lace up your sneakers and maybe open the door. Then maybe you take the first step, then the second. And maybe you actually run for a few minutes.
I had a terrifying and exhilarating experience yesterday.
I went on a date with someone I actually could see a future with. And we went fly fishing – an activity I have always wanted to try but never felt brave enough to attempt, in part because it requires walking in a flowing river with water up to the waist.
I run anxious to start and potentially dangerous situations tend to exasperate that anxiety – so in addition to learning a new skill, I had to quiet the voice in my head that was urging me to “be careful”.
Nature has always offered my easiest route to quieting my mind, whether it be spending time in nature or topically applying essential oils derived from plants found in nature. I decided to see how the Parasympathetic® blend performed when I really needed it. I reached into my pocket, pulled out the blend and topically applied it behind both ears – as I often do when anxiety feels intense.
Within seconds (yes, it worked THAT FAST!), I could feel my body relaxing into the flow of the river rushing around me. It was a moment of complete surrender. In this surrender, I stopped listening to the voice in my head and was able to tune into my body and really land in the moment – without all of the anxieties that usually plague me.
I stepped outside of my comfort zone – and I was still okay.
Which empowered me to feel even braver and better prepared for the next challenge.
I am often told that I am brave – that I take on challenges that might frighten other people.
But that is not true.
I do not feel brave. In fact, most of the time I feel terrified, or overwhelmed or anxious.
It is not that I “feel” brave. It is that even when I don’t feel brave, I keep going.
I don’t let the anxiety stop me.
Instead, I keep chipping away at the iceberg – despite the anxiety.
What I lack in bravery, I make up for in perseverance.
And I have a secret weapon – my Parasympathetic® blend.
It literally turns on calm so that I can shift OUT of my HEAD – where my anxiety runs rampant – and INTO my BODY where I can relax and take the next step toward my goal.
To help support anxiety and overwhelm, simply apply a drop of Parasympathetic® behind your earlobe on your mastoid bone.
Please share how this has worked for you in the comments below!
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