As many of you know, I lost my 12 year old son Max in a tragic car accident a few years ago. He was brilliant, funny, creative, handsome, kind and full of life. But more than that, he and his surviving sister were the lights of my life and my raison d’etre.
It was Max and his childhood health concerns that inspired me to first immerse myself in nutrition, then plant medicine. Some of his health challenges inspired me to create some of our best-selling blends, like the Histamine Balance™ blend and the Migraine Support™ blend, and his critical mind and clever feedback were a source of constant inspiration.
I don’t think it was possible to love a child more than I loved Max and I don’t even begin to know how I am going to cope with his loss.
But, in my typically hyper-organized manner, I have attempted to research grief which truthfully has been extremely frustrated, because all anyone can tell me is that it is going to be really hard, take a really long time and that I will never be the same again.
While I believe that tragedy does change you, I cannot accept that it has to destroy you. That I now have to be typecast as that “sad mom” or “the mom who was never the same”.
Instead, I want to find a way to be a better mom and a better person. To recognize how precious every moment is, and land in those moments – those moments of joy, of awe, or wonder and compassion.
I am so grateful to have taken an off-grid trip with both of my children immediately before Max’s passing. While he was furious with me over the lack of WiFi in the Amazon jungle, it allowed us the time and space to really connect. To have long conversations over meals, card games and hikes through Inca ruins. To laugh together as we struggled with the language, the inability to drink tap water, the way transportation never ran on time and the threat of malaria and yellow fever. To marvel at the nature, the animals, the customs and the different pace of life.
Grief definitely has some gifts. It immediately strips you of your default habits and forces you to do things differently. I will continue to share what I learn on this journey in the hopes that it will help others navigate through their own life shifts.
Grief has also given me the gift of testing my oils blends first-hand and in action. Along with friends and family, these oils have been what have helped me survive the last few days.
Lung Support™ – Our grief blend. I knew to grab this right away and my instinct didn’t fail me. Upon hearing from the state patrol that an accident had occurred with one fatality, I began dowsing myself with this blend. It took over an hour (what felt like an eternity) for the officer to identify my child as the deceased and the Lung Support blend felt like a life line.
Parasympathetic® – for grounding. One of the early stages of grief is shock – denial, magical thinking, bargaining – all the mental tricks that allow you to cope with the trauma by not actually experiencing the trauma. Parasympathetic helped me to ground into my body a bit more to be in the moment and the trauma.
Small Intestine Support™ – for boundaries – As an introvert, the over-whelming outpouring of support has been a bit over-whelming. While I am profoundly grateful for all the people who have shown up and stepped in, it has been a challenge to navigate my house full of people and Small Intestine Support has helped me stay grounded and clear.
Circadian Rhythm® – I was told that my only assignments during the first few days were to eat, sleep and move. Of the three, sleep was the most challenging and kind friends wrote prescriptions for all sorts of sleeping pills, none of which seem to work well for me, so circadian rhythm proved
Frankincense™ – I have a very take it or leave it relationship with Frankincense. It either smells divine or a little too earthy. At the moment, I am really drawn to it and have been slathering it over my heart.
Resources:
Ready to get started? Click the links below to order today:
- Circadian Rhythm® available here
- Frankincense™ available here
- Histamine Balance™ available here
- Lung Support™ available here
- Migraine Support™ available here
- Parasympathetic® available here
- Small Intestine Support™ available here
